Exh works part time / school hours / term time only.I have them 4 nights a week and he has them 3 nights. Tbh my experience of any form of shared care is that it's difficult for teens who find their lives easier to manage with one main home and benefit from one main carer who's on top of their lives. This means that one parent has the children every Monday and Tuesday night. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. The other parent has the children every Wednesday and Thursday night. For instance, your ex may take on more work once you split, so he may not be around after school either and then both of you will need to find a solution - it won't just be you, iyswim. If there are no clubs after school, could your h have them and then you collect from his? D1 is our baby sitter so yes she'd happily be home with the girls if I needed her to be and was around. D2 could walk to school if I stay close enough and I could pick her up with D3 from her dads, but it's really tricky as I start early sometimes. Custody-working nights Quick question- I got a job working night shift from 11pm-7am. How flexible is your work? They have dinner with the non-week parent on a Wednesday so that it's not a whole week without contact. I work full time and do 50:50. My ex and I have a 5/5/2 schedule. We share 50/50 custody and when we first agreed it was fine. If your area is one in which 50/50 shared custody is the norm, his wife caring for your child while he works will likely be seen as a reasonable choice. That means both got some fixed days of the week when they could work early/late with no worries about kids. Ie would 18 year still be at home for a while? We work together well for the sake of the children, we are not perfect at it, but I think we are better than most, we rearrange our time for each other if needed. It can't be long till both of them could do that? Share with Tangle Teezer - £100 voucher to be won, Your questions about the Green Homes Grant have been answered by the experts from the BEIS and EST, Share your stories about your children’s favourite toys with Munchkin Nursery Steriliser - £100 voucher to be won, Talk widget showing discussions of the day & trending threads, Subscribe to Mumsnet emails direct to your inbox. I consider it to be more or less 50/50. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support. We did this for a while (though ex came here rather than the other way round) and it eased the transition, then you might find other arrangements evolve quite naturally from there. I drive her around to work etc at weekends and social occasions so we have a good relationship. 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